Mobile Desibells

As a whole, India is a nation of high decibel levels. Whether it be the human beings or the animals or even our vehicles or industries, all of us seem to have turned our volumes turned up to the full. While the debate still rages as to how much we are aping the West with regards to our culture, religion, clothes, choice of beverages, language, etc., we have managed to stay true with regards to our decibel levels. Nothing exemplifies this than our mobile phone usage.

Mobile phones came as an elitist gadget. There’s this story about a Bollywood star who possessed one and felt the need to show it off in a restaurant. So, he took it off and used all his acting skills in replying to an imaginary caller. To everyone’s amusement and his utter embarrassment, his phone rang at just that time! Very soon, mobile phones became much more popular, but it took Dhirubhai Ambani to dream for mobile phones to be accessible to a wider population. Overnight, India had a mobile revolution, and every other building seemed to sport a tele-tower. Handsets got smaller and sleeker, and they also opened up avenues for revenue generation in the form of games, ringtones, wallpapers etc. which all could be downloaded for a price. Very soon, we had an addition to the city’s airwaves – ringtones ranging from musical to funny to obnoxious. Indians were breaking out from the colonial hangover and nothing exemplified this better than the emergence of the brash mobile wielders. It was considered quite cool to have your mobile suddenly break out into a Bollywood item number while you were praying at a temple for some peace in your life. To get a call in the midst of attending a concert was hoped for, so that you will be the center of attention, even if it wasn’t a very welcome one. In this age of any publicity being good publicity, mobile ring tones certainly became the flag bearers.

If there’s anything more intolerable than mobile ring tones, then it is the way people talk over the mobile phones. Of course, the blame lies with the nation for producing people who don’t understand the meaning of talking softly. Right from the time a baby is born, it has to yell at the top of its voice to be heard above the din that’s present each day. Cars would be honking, dogs would be barking, salesmen will be yelling and all of them doing it mostly needlessly. With all this happening around me, it is quite difficult trying to have a conversation going through a telephone in the confines of my house. So, imagine having to have that same conversation in the midst of all the din. Now one begins to realize how tough it is for someone using the mobile phone to keep their voice levels down. There are going to be certain times when all around me is quite silent, but is that my fault? After all, how much can you expect me to accommodate? I am accommodating enough when you are making noise around me and still carrying on with my conversation; do you expect me to be accommodating even when you are quiet?

That said, the lack of control over the voice chords does provide some interesting trivia at the most unexpected of moments. I was once going from Bangalore to Coimbatore in a bus and having to suffer through a Kollywood torture called Vel, starring Surya. So, even as I watched Surya jump over a couple of trucks to reach near the villain, I heard my neighbour’s phone ringing. Not realizing how much more interesting this was going to get (having seen Vel for 10 minutes, I should have guessed), I didn’t really pay attention initially, but his voice demanded my attention. In fact, I am sure half the bus was forced to listen to it while he described how he managed to impress his girlfriend, the various techniques used in this operation, and how he finally proposed and made her his wife. I could see many youngsters looking at him with great respect after that for having taught them some effective dating techniques. Another time was while at a theater where a senior manager (I guessed that because he had an impressive potbelly preceding him) revealed a few things about corporate life when he announced how busy he was, attending a meeting and he couldn’t be disturbed even as Emraan Hashmi was about to indulge in yet another of his liplocks. Yet another time, this time in a train, I came to realize about a certain woman’s lack of appetite during menstrual cycle and her aversion towards men with bodily hair. As I said, very interesting trivia, though the usefulness of some of these might be questioned.

With the attack by the moral police on the rise, I don’t think people are going to be really brave enough to lower their voices while talking lest they be considered as digressing from our culture. In fact, I am sure the younger generation will get to learn a lot more about the world around them if they are to just listen to others around them. The good thing about this is that they won’t even have to work hard for it since people would be shouting anyways. I am glad that West hasn’t been able to influence our desibells! Jai ho!!!